He's baaaaa-aaaack!

There's a sound coming from down the hallway in our home. I hear it and it makes me smile...again. It is the noisy "clunk-clunk" sound of ACU's spinnng in my dryer. That sound can only mean one thing: My soldier is home!!! This is a fact that we began celebrating 2 weeks ago tonight. Getting our soldier back was quite the late night adventure.

His unit's plane couldn't land at the Army airfield here on post so they were forced to make a landing at the nearest international airport and ride a shuttle for the remainder of the trip to our post. His arrival time was sent to us via Army text message and we were told to be there by 2:45am. I hemmed and hawed and went back and forth about "should I bring the kids?" or "should I go by myself since it's during the night?" Finally I decided upon bringing the oldest and leaving the youngest to sleep while a neighbor stayed at our house. So, after a few hours rest I gathered up my young lad and off we went to pick up our hero, along with my sweet friend and trusted photographer Elizabeth! Even though we didn't have a Green Ramp experience, it was still quite a momentous occasion. It was the black of night but the heat index didn't know the difference. We were all sweating within a few minutes of arrival. Approximately 350 people gathered under the stars to await their loved ones. Once the charter buses pulled in, screaming commenced. They filed in, marching in formation to Queen's "We will rock you". The elements of the 525th BFSB took the brigade field and awaited their release from the General in attendance. Almost needless to say, we were ecstatic to have our "daddy hero" back. We rushed towards him once the formalities were over and Dylan jumped into his arms. He got the first hug but I got the first kiss. As it should be.

Oh, and baby girl got her own VIP pass to see Daddy the next morning. He snuck into her room and she did NOT know what to think. She has quickly warmed up to his smile and his lap!

Tim was given a 48 hour pass and since then has been reporting to work for half days. His first week home was spent relaxing and reintegrating. Our second week was spent having extended family in our home and hosting a double-party..."Welcome Home!" and "Happy Birthday, Jordan!". Block leave (30 days of paid leave-time) starts this Thursday and we are looking forward to some solid family time and vacation. Thank you, God, for answering SO many prayers with these 2 pictures!

And in conclusion…

A year has passed. I cannot fathom how a year has gone by so quickly and yet there have been times where it seemed like "a day was as a thousand years." I can remember this time last year wondering to myself if there was a doctor out there who could just put me in a coma for a year and wake me when this was all over. What a mistake that would have been…to have missed out on all that God had for me and would do to and through me. To have missed out on the good AND the bad. In my heart and my mind I have been trying to say "goodbye" to this season in my life; to boil it down to a few nuggets I can take away and share with others. It is hard to simplify such an arduous process. Spend any time around Army wives and you will quickly learn that they define themselves and their families in terms of deployments. This is a byproduct of war that I am still not sure that I'm okay with. I am a firm believer that it's not what life throws at you but what you make of it that really counts. So to define myself in terms of whether my husband is home or gone seems like I am letting life's punches call the shots instead of taking my life by the horns, no matter my husband's current continent.

There have been many moments that I thought I was teetering near the brink of insanity. Usually this was due to something my beautiful and precious childrens were bringing to the equation at the time. For those who have read my previous posts, I'll not take you to that crazy place again. Suffice it to say that God undoubtedly knew that was a path I needed to go down in order to better sharpen and hone certain facets of my character. What I feel now is stronger. Stronger physically, stronger mentally, stronger emotionally. Running and yoga have been my "outlets" this past year. They allowed me to free my mind and free my body as well. As Eric Little said, I definitely felt the Lord's pleasure as I pounded out many a mile while listening to worship music or rattling off my thoughts to Him. Mentally I am stronger because I have been under constant stress and pressure and have had no choice but to deal with it. There was no "out", no other adult in the house with me. It was up to me and God to work it out and see it through. Problems that would have once made me throw my hands up and walk away required that I stay and deal with them. I was remarking on this recently as I found myself easily finagling a series of events that at the beginning of this deployment would have tripped me up and ruined my attitude for the day.

I mentioned an emotional strengthening as well. When it came to emotions, my husband was that rock solid wall that I could run to with any emotion I was feeling and could spatter it out against his strength knowing he could take it and it would not topple him. In his absence, I have had to turn more often to the Lord first rather than him (I usually found myself at His throne eventually but sometimes my first place to go was hubby). I have also had to work through some tough emotions on my own without his listening ear and guidance. I wish that I could say that I burdened my husband very little with the cares and worries of home while he was away, but I fear they were brought to his attention more times than I would probably care to remember. He lovingly told me each time that he didn't mind listening to me and cared about each concern I was having. He would even venture to offer wisdom and suggestions. But it was up to me to do the hard task of steadying myself and wading through the emotional waters I encountered. I am proud of the job I have done this year. Not proud in an idolatrous way. It's more that I am satisfied with the job I have done this year. I know the time is soon coming when I will be able to take a deep breath, "rest", and look back on this and be pleased.

My husband and I joke with each other that things were going well in our marriage until we separated for a year. In all seriousness, another conclusion I (we) have come to is the irony that our marriage has never grown so much in the past 11 years as it did this year we were apart. It forced us to grow, to adapt, to look for new ways of keeping our love alive. To focus on the things we love and miss about each other. We were deprived of the physical pleasures of marriage which made us seek to speak the other's love language even more. My husband loved on me diligently with "words of affirmation", which I deeply crave. My challenge was to find different ways to love him through physical touch (his #1 love language) which I did through care packages and "touching" him each day through e-mail communication. The #2 love language for both of us is quality time, so a phone call every day met both of our needs. We have now put down roots on different and deeper levels and I look forward to seeing the health and life that will bring to our relationship once we are back under the same roof.

I recently read an article on "Independence in Marriage". The gist of it was that a woman can be strong and independent and still submit in a godly way to her husband. The article's title got me thinking on the independence in our marriage. What the Army has taken our marriage through is a messed-up myriad of weirdness. Two people, deeply in love, forced to live apart, living independent lives full of difficult choices they must bear, yet at their very core they are inseparable by a covenant made before God and man. Good thing that our God is sovereign, hmmm?

Summertime Blueberries

I took the kids blueberry picking today (with another friend and her 3 girls) and these pictures are the result. Gardening and fruit picking has become my new favorite kid activity. Abundance of vegetation to be picked, little hands busy doing work, learning about God and his delicious creation, snacking while we work, no mess to clean up – a perfect activity! Dylan is being allowed to dress himself in the summertime (thank goodness for uniforms in the fall!) which is why he is STILL wearing his VBS shirt…from a month ago. Oh, and we scored 5.75 pounds of blueberry goodness…a $5 feast!!

The story we heard was that Cindy, the lady who runs the blueberry farm, bought the house and property many years back not knowing that the gnarly rows of trees near the back of the property were perennial blueberries! She nearly had them cut down! So glad she didn't.

One of our dear friends Willa.

Found a lone grape vine. A neat sight for the kids. We talked about the vine that grew up over Jonah's head in the last chapter of his book. I know it was most likely a gourd vine, but it's the closest thing the kids had ever seen to a vine that could provide shade.

Our blue-tiful harvest!

Happy Independence Day!

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. -- The Declaration of Independence, July 4th, 1776

The 4th of July was our last holiday spent apart for this deployment. How fitting that the celebration of our nation's independence would be our final holiday before our soldier's return! We did the day up right, starting with an 8am streetwide 5K run/walk race. We had a fairly good turnout considering much of the street was out of town. I have mentioned this before but life on a military installation is unlike anything that can be found in the civilian world. Even without knowing the new person who just moved in across from you there will be several things you will have in common with them from the get-go: a deep love for Country, a willing heart to serve, similar rank...and probably kids! :-) Living on-post allows you to cut through the first 6 months of typical relationships and cut right to the meat of what matters. Besides, your neighbors could be PCS'ing before 6 months are over with! It was really nice to spend some great time with our neighbors, new and old alike, and exercise our bodies at the same time.

Shannon, Meghan, and Jenn...deployed spouses triple threat on the 5K!

Dylan and Miles. Yes, they're in their PJ's :-)

Our street kids. Too precious!

In the afternoon we continued our streetwide 4th of July celebration with a BBQ and games and contests for the kids. We had a watermelon seed spitting contest, a 50 stars search, and a water balloon toss contest. The kids had a blast! Each family brought their own meats and a few generous soldiers manned the grills for us. We had a slip-n-slide, a kiddie pool, and prizes too. It was a great event and we had about 16 or so families join us. Dylan and I stayed up to watch the post-wide fireworks display with some neighborhood friends. While we were waiting we lit off a few of our own. Of course Dylan and his buddy Miles were dazzled by the fireworks, regardless of whether they were our glorified bottle rockets or the thousand dollar display. Fire, gun powder, explosions, brightly colored lights? I mean, come on, a little boy's dream, right?

Miles and Dylan

Thank you, God, for this great land which affords us so many freedoms. May we NEVER forget the blood that has been shed to make it possible. May we NEVER take for granted the spirit of liberty that birthed this nation. And may we NEVER waver from our committment to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

(All images except the firework picture courtesy of my friend Shannon! :-)

Nearing the end...letting perseverance finish its work

1 month. Exactly. Well, as exact as they get in the Army. That is how much longer until our favorite chaplain begins his journey home. I am in "reflecting" mode and thought my blog would be a perfect place to talk through things. First off I must say that I am TRULY amazed at what the Lord has done in, through, and around me the past 11 months. On a wall in our home is etched the verse Psalm 33:20 "We put our hope in the Lord. He is our help and our shield." Never were words more true for us this past year than those. This deployment thing was tougher than I thought, but the Lord was more faithful than I could have ever imagined. It tested my faith and I found Him to be true. James 1:2-4 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

God has enabled me to accomplish so many things -- no small feat for a woman with two small kids. It is exhausting just to think back over what it has taken to survive the past 11 months. How many loads of laundry? How many wee-hours-of-the-morning awakenings? How many dishwasher-fulls? How many doctors appointments? How many reaches for the other side of the bed only to find it empty? But at the same time He has taught me alot about being interruptible and letting go of tasks that I cannot start or finish. As I write this post, I sit here with my feet propped up on the ottoman next to a full, unfolded basket of laundry on my left and an empty bowl of ice cream on my right. A pretty good snapshot of what my evenings have looked like. A little "me" time and a little "catching up on chores" time. For those of you out there considering the military or about to embark on your first deployment, I'm sure you will find out as I have that organization and time-management WILL be your best friends and your sanity-keeper.

My children amaze me...they never cease to be a wellspring of either chaos or pure joy...and most days a bit of both. Jordan is nearing the 23 month mark and is well beyond that developmentally in so many ways. She uses a combination of pointing to objects, bringing me objects, mimicking, and baby sign language to communicate with me. She has begun to "read" books to herself and LOVES to tell jokes (that only she understands) and laughs HYSTERICALLY at them. It is really pretty cute. She likes to tickle me and Dylan. She thinks Daddy is either a computer or a picture in a frame. She still has a love affair with food and eats every meal in an artistic way. Her hair is turning a lighter shade of golden blonde as we are spending more time at the pool. She is a fearless dare-angel at the pool, provided she has her life vest on. She has already taken to wading where she can barely stand and jumping from the sides into my arms. When I look into her face, I see nothing but pure beauty. All her facial features together combined with her deep blue eyes are just gorgeous. She can say about 20 words (No, more, please, thank you, bless you, my favorite "let's pray!", yes, dada, mama, Dylan, shoes, juice, let's go, show, why, dog, ball, etc.). She is an absolute joy!

Dylan is growing up so fast before my very eyes. Sometime when I wasn't looking he morphed from a preschool kid in to a kindergartener. He is such a clever and creative kid. He's like a mini-McGuiver at times. He can make a "make-shift" anything out of, well, ANYTHING! He TOTALLY gets that from his dad...but I am catching on to it too :) Lately he has been showing signs that he is on the verge of putting all the right pieces of faith together to become a Christian. He asks about it at least several times a week but at this point is still seeing it as a "get-out-of-hell-free" ticket. However, he is VERY close to understanding that the biggest deal is his sin. What an EXCITING thing to watch! Our very own son's eyes are being opened to the truth of God's word. As we said in VBS on-post this year, "Thank you, God!!"

Our summer is in full swing now that preschool is out and we are back from our 2-week Bama trip. It was so nice to get away and to be able to stay with Mom and Dad for 2 weeks. I don't think I've ever left home and been gone for that long. It ws very refreshing. We have been spending time at the pools, either our home kiddie pool or the neighborhood center pool. The kids LOVE the outdoors so we end up spending some amount of time outside every day. We are also making the rounds with our play dates. I know once daddy is home we will be doing ALOT of family time, so we are playing with friends while we can now. I planted a garden this year and it is doing very well. It is my first garden and not too shabby if I do say so myself! Already had herbs, onions, tomatos, cucumbers, and bell peppers!

Chaplain is doing well and is ready to come home! I think he and his troops are experiencing a combination of senioritis/stale relationships/exhaustion/extreme heat/desert crazies. He is just hoping they can make it another month without anything crazy or tragic happening. The Lord has truly been good to our brigade and our casualties have been at a very minimum level.

I am hoping to blog more soon, but I am thinking the next month will be sort of busy! Trying not to miss anything the Lord may want to show me or do through me even in the midst of the excitement...

Our sweet little arrows

VBS - Big Apple Adventure!

Our not-so li'l Dylan had the opportunity to participate in his grandfather's church's VBS this summer! So exciting! Their church allowed pre-K 5's to participate in their own version of the "Big Apple Adventure". Dylan had a fantastic time! Every day we heard new stories and songs from his lips about New York City, the statue of liberty, Jesus, and the Bible. The pictures and video below are of "Family Night". So excited that he had this chance and that he fell in love with VBS!